that 11 oclock, should be goin to sleep post

My last week with the 6th graders. Some im glad to see leave, some not so much. But we all have to leave sometimes right. One day it will be my time.

Talkin to my friends about age differences in relationships. Is it a big factor is starting a relationship?

Me for example, i wont date anyone younger than me. In other words, I only date mean older men. My first boyfriend being 23 (it wasn't 25) when I was 18. Thats a 5 year difference. And i know, no more now than i did know then, that a 5 year difference in age, when you are so young yourself, is a big factor. I usually dont like to agree with any man who i have arguments with. Like my mom im very stubborn, especially when im in an argument. Want and will always have the last word. But anyways, i can actually and truthfully say that I agree with him. My eyes were clouded by those books I read, the movies I watched, those teenish fantasies of the perfect boyfriend. I wanted to mold him into that perfect man.

My first boyfriend, my first love, first other things. We were even engaged for a sec.

I deeply loved him. And in the love bubble i wrapped over us, i wasn't expecting his views to start breaking it down. In the beginning I thought it was all him. His abrasive personality, his very opinionate mind. But it took some time, maybe even some years till i realized that it was my immaturity that also cause that bubble to break. I didn't understand how he could act too nonchalant in certain occasions, how he could not care.

In the end i realized that not only did he break that love bubble, he tried to break that bubble i wrapped securely around myself that protects my youthful views of world. I didn't understand him. Our lives were different. Grew up with different experiences. And instead of trying to understand, i just questioned his opinion. It wasn't how I thought the way people should act. And more, love does cloud judgement.

But i understand why he called me immature. I argued that I wasn't. 18 your a legal adult. But really we are still children mentally.

If i could i would go back in time and i would slap myself. Tell myself to open, really open my eyes wide, broaden my box, broaden my scope on how people in this world act. We are selfish beings. Things are going to happen that you dont want to happen. No use of whining about it. You have two options: Do something to insure that it doesnt happen again or walk way. Yeah some slapage would be in order.

But don't ge wrong, my first boyfriend was still a dick and an asshole and jerk.

that took me 49 mins to type wow.

My daring escape!

People be careful of Nastassja Camille Vidrio!

She might look like she's planning to take your advice, she smiles, she agrees. But in her mind she's plottin her next move.

Well..... yes be careful of me cause i dont think most people know the things that roam around in my head. But this weekend, i was bold, daring and went against my doctor's, co-workers, boss's advice to stay home and rest. Yeah it's been a week since i had surgery, but that didn't stop me. Hey i'm young, life is short. Can't just spend my time recovering all alone. And before i even say what i did, i want to make a point first that i did listen to their advice, for two days. I did it. Just not as long as they wanted me too.

I emailed my friend, packed and walked down the hill with that Mission Impossible song in my head. "Will Nastassja get caught by one of her teachers as she tries to leave Iwaki?" And by my luck, i could've picked the worse time to leave my safe haven. My bus came at 4:26. 4:05 work is over and it's a friday. And of course, the bus was late.

Luckily, made it out of iwaki with no incidents. But soon regretted it when the bus started to rattle and the pain came. Well my doctor did warn me about moving my body a lot.....

Made it to Koriyama. Wanted to go straight to my friends house, just crash in front of the tv and eat a salad. Of course that was delayed since she wanted me to buy her a dr. pepper and french cheese at the international food store. But that cheese was great. Shober cheese. Great stuff that is.

I escaped and i do feel a lot more informed about what's happenin in the world now. I basically sat in front of the tv and watched CNN, MTV and random shows like Bones, CSI, Dirty Jobs, Anthony Bourdain, Mulan 2 and Detective Conan. Oh i love tv.

And Obama rocks.

So it was a great chillaxin weekend. I know lucy is glad i left cause i was actin like the world's most laziest friend who comes over, eats all the food, doesn't clean (I cooked dinner tho) and never gets up from the couch. I was also abusing the "I just had surgery" line too many times. It's great to be a couch potato sometimes. And its soo easy to do it at her house.

Oh also my child is gonna have a mo-hawk when he's a baby and be able to speak another language by the time he is 5. But lucy said that mo-hawk is not possible with my hair. Well lucy i will prove it to you!

I go back to work tomorrow. Im a little bit worried. This school has only 5 kids but i know ill get tired and just end up sitting down the rest of the day. I can't run, can't push or carry heavy things. Well i guess i can be lazy and abuse "I just had surgery"

no pain no gain

For the past seven days ive been, well the first two days, chilaxin in the bed watching movies and the for the next 5, gradually moving around and trying not to laugh and cough. Coughin is the worst. Oh didnt say where i was. Back to the same hospital. Nurses laughed when i walked off the elevator and passed the nurses station. Ohh shes back. All that oily food shes eaten again.

Nope this time was just for surgery. Thats seems very nonchalant and that was my attitude arriving there. With my luggage resting on my shoulder and forearm walking like i would at the airport. Going on a little trip. Get cut up, rest in the hospital and go home. I just thought about the beginning and the end of my time at the hospital. Surgery and no more gall stones. Besides being scared half to death from the anesthesia, the point where i felt that recovery is a major part of surgery, wasnt till i woke up the next morning with tubes in my body and the pain of somone repeatedly kicking my insides. Not a good moment.

Well good things that did come out of this surgery experience:

1. No more gallstones, no more pain.
2. Able to see my gall stones. Even took them home (maybe thats more of an interesting thing)
3. Spent a wonderful week with 5 great japanese ladies
4. Made the 4th floor east wing more international
5. felt loved from my friends and co-workers
6. My love grew for my friends and some co-workers :)
7. Learned how to say "cuddle" and "crush" in Japanese. Very useful words.
8. Broadened my iwaki-ben vocabulary
9. Lost 4 pounds, not like i see it.

Theres so many people i want to say thank you to. All that laughing really made my spirits lift high and moved those stomach muscles. Even if it hurt and i had to get re-stitched. It was all worth it. Watching the people who came to visit me at the hospital, laughing around me and bringing me get well gifts. Can I be so lucky to have people who care for me so much. Im so happy. But as i sit alone right now, i can honestly say that i miss that environment. But dont want to be in that environment again.

One thing i will not miss....the food. But its not like i can jump straight for babas either. Im gonna be on the recovery trail for about a month I believe. How does your stomach cope when a part of it goes missing? "Hey, where did gall bladder go? wasn't he there earlier". Anyways, so gotta be good on my diet and move around.

However, my belly button looks kind've weird. Four smalls cuts, but my belly button looks ifie. Recovery stage right? Hope its not like that for long.

Well for now, no pain no gain.....and try not to eat chocolate (the hardest task)